Great.

I'm getting fucking antsy.  My life is pretty fucking awful right now.  Single.  Lodging.  Practically living out of a suitcase.  Shit, 20 hour a week job, so I'm barely earning anything to scrape by on.  I'm going on tour in less than a month.  I should be fucking ecstatic, but I'm not.  It feels like it's going to be a fucking chore.  I'm really quite tempted just to sell the car, jack in the job and sign on.  Not a single job application has gone anywhere near an interview in 8 months.  I've had two denial responses.  AND THAT'S IT.  So why should I even bother.  I genuinely think I'd be happier, bumming about in my pants all day, scrounging money from the state.  Sure people would hate me, and think I'm scum, but that's not much different to now.  The only person who I even feel like talking to is her.  The girl I had planned my future with.  Now that's gone, I may as well just give up.  My rock has left me, it was the only thing holding me up.  Now I've slumped.  A stick in the mud.  A flat tyre.  What's the fucking point anymore.



I guess "Antsy" is putting it mildly.